When is the right time to discuss mental health with a loved one? Often, conversations like this are difficult or even uncomfortable. Talking about mental health isn’t easy, even with the people we are closest to.
It’s important to remember, though, that talking about mental health is essential for the well-being of both you and your loved one. Opening up a dialogue creates a safe space for them to express their feelings and seek the help they need.
If you’re worried about a loved one’s psychological condition, this blog post will help you understand what to say and how to start the conversation.
Starting the Conversation
Preparation is key when discussing mental health with a loved one. Before you start, think about your approach. Is it best to talk one-on-one or in a group setting? Depending on the situation, you may choose one or the other based on if you think it’s best to have a more intimate conversation.
Think about the main points you want to discuss in the chat. It might be helpful to write down a few key points to refer back to if necessary. They will also act as your guide during the talk and prevent you from getting off track.
These other considerations can also guide you in planning for your discussion:
Self Preparation
Before launching into the conversation, take a few moments to recognize and readjust your emotions. Appreciate why you’re so worried about your loved one. Doing so will remind you of what’s at stake in having an open and honest dialogue.
With that appreciation comes courage: mentally prepare yourself for how the conversation may go. Brace yourself for the battle you’ll face in getting them to talk about their feelings openly, and have a plan for how you will handle any potential reactions.
The Right Environment
One crucial element in having a successful conversation about mental health is space. Choose one that’s quiet, comfortable, and private, so your loved one will feel free to open up and talk.
It could be your living room, a sunny park bench, or a favorite peaceful cafe—whatever works best for both of you. Wherever you choose, make sure there is little to no distraction so that you can have a productive conversation.
The Timing
The right moment matters when it comes to delicate discussions like these. Therefore, choose your timing wisely.
For instance, set the stage for a relaxed and inviting atmosphere by initiating a discussion after your loved one has had some downtime. That can be in the evening after work or on a lazy weekend morning.
Try to avoid having this talk during episodes of stress or anger from either party to make progress. Likewise, if you’re feeling anxious or have an appointment soon that would leave little room for meaningful dialogue, hold off until another situation arises where both parties are in better headspaces.
Be Empathetic
When discussing mental health, empathy should come first. You must let your loved one know you’re there for them and provide emotional support.
You want to avoid coming across as judgmental or aggressive. Instead, focus on understanding their feelings and validating them. Doing so lets them know you’re listening and will support them no matter what. It is also how we can ensure our presence amidst difficult times in their life.
Listen and React Appropriately
Be an attentive listener when the special person in your life is ready to share. Show understanding and empathy by validating their perspective. Refraining from interrupting them and acknowledging their words without judgment can also go beyond providing answers.
Open up the conversation for sharing with patience and support. Resist giving quick advice or becoming too reactive. Remember that it’s important that they know you are there as a companion throughout whatever feelings of vulnerability arise.
Encourage Professional Help
Once you’ve established that there is a mental health concern, it may be time to suggest professional help. Explain the benefits of talking to a mental health professional and how taking the step can aid them in the long run. Doing so is especially true for loved ones who are suicidal or have a substance use disorder.
Have a list of local support services or treatments available to them. You can also research online therapy services if they prefer to talk to a professional online. Offering to accompany them during their appointments is a great way to show your support.
Get the Right Support
Mental health conditions can be tough to tackle alone. Unless you are a professional, seeking help from the right people is essential. Otherwise, it can be detrimental to your loved one’s emotional well-being.
Therefore, consider getting expert help or advice from mental health specialists. If you need help figuring out where to start, your doctor or local hospital can be a great resource in finding the right service for your loved one.
Support groups can be beneficial, too. By talking to people with similar experiences and receiving advice from specialists, you can better understand how to handle your loved one’s mental health condition. Alvarado Parkway Institute has a virtual family and friends group that meets weekly to help provide clarity, answers, and support. The National Alliance on Mental Illness Family Support Group, Families for Depression Awareness, and Hazelden are also all great resources for this cause.
Don’t Forget About Self-care
Finally, remember to practice self-care during this process. You can’t pour from an empty cup. So, ensure you’re taking care of your mental health, too.
Engage in some self-care activities to help manage stress, such as yoga, reading a book, or listening to music. Talk to a friend, write in a journal, or do something creative to help process tough emotions during the conversation with your loved one.
It’s essential to know your limits as well. Seek help from a mental health professional if needed. And if the situation becomes too overwhelming or challenging, feel free to step away and take a break.
Ways to Share Your Concerns
Once you’re prepared for the conversation, it’s time to start talking. You don’t have to jump right in. Sometimes, it can be beneficial to ease into the conversation. Here are some ways you can express your concerns:
- “I’ve noticed you seem a bit down lately, and I wanted to check in with you. How are you doing?”
- “I’m worried about you and want to know if there is anything I can do to help.”
- “I’ve noticed a change in your mood and care about you. Is there something going on?”
- “I’m here for you if you ever want to discuss how things are going.”
- “I know this can be difficult to talk about, but I’m concerned and want to help. Can we talk together?”
These are just some simple phrases to start the conversation. Choose whatever feels most comfortable for you, and remember not to be too pushy or judgmental. Let them know it’s okay to talk about their feelings and that you’re there for them.
While doing so, keep these tips in mind to keep your conversation productive and supportive:
- Be respectful and understanding
- Use a loving and comforting tone
- Avoid asking too many questions
- Let them know that it’s okay to take a break if needed
- Avoid passing judgment
- Be patient and listen carefully
- Don’t pressure them to share more than they are comfortable with
- Keep away from any comparison to other people
- Encourage them to seek help when needed
You can also read about your loved one’s diagnosis if they have one. It will help you understand the condition and how to support them better. Knowing about their symptoms can also give you an idea of what kind of help they may need when things get difficult.
At the end of the day, you know your loved one best. So, be sure to use your best judgment and compassion when having the conversation. Approach them with a tone and setting they respond to best and always be there for them.
Remember, it is okay not to have all the answers. It’s also not your job to “fix” the situation. Your goal is to create a safe and supportive environment for them to talk about their feelings and seek the help they need—even if that means just listening.
How to Help Them Find Help
If your loved one does need help, you can assist them in finding the right treatment for their needs. You can find out what their insurance covers and if any therapy programs fit their preferences.
Additionally, research local support groups, hotlines, or mental health centers near you that can provide assistance. You can also look up different therapists and read reviews to get a better sense of the services they offer. Here are some of the best places to start:
- National Alliance on Mental Illness
- Mental Health America
- National Institute of Mental Health
- American Psychiatric Association
- Active Minds
- The Trevor Project
- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
- Anxiety and Depression Association of America
- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
- Federation of Families for Children’s Mental Health
- Families for Depression Awareness
- Yellow Ribbon
Another great way to help is to offer physical and emotional support. Ask them what they need, whether it’s running errands together, attending a therapy session with them, or simply reminding them to take their medication.
If your loved one is going through a more serious mental health issue, check in with them regularly to see how they’re doing and ensure they stay on track with their treatment. You can also help them set realistic goals and remind them of the importance of self-care.
Be Prepared for Their Reaction
Like any difficult conversation, you never know how your loved one will respond. After all, it could go either way. They may finally feel relieved to talk about it or shut down and become defensive.
If you do encounter the following reactions, consider these tips on how to respond:
- Negative. If your loved one responds negatively, try not to take it personally. Remain calm, avoid becoming defensive, and focus on validating their feelings. Ask them open-ended questions about what’s worrying them and listen without judgment. And if it’s necessary to postpone the conversation until another time, let them know you will be there when they’re ready.
- Positive. On the other hand, if your loved one responds positively, encourage them to keep talking and offer any resources you think may help. Let them know you’re there for them and that taking their time to seek help is okay. You can also offer to connect them with a mental health professional or support group if that’s something they’re interested in.
- Overwhelmed. Finally, if you encounter someone feeling overwhelmed by the conversation, let them know that it’s okay to take a break. Don’t pressure them to continue if they don’t feel like it. Rather, let them know you are there and can talk when they’re ready.
No matter the response, it is important to remember that the goal of this conversation is to show your loved one that they are not alone. The journey to mental health can be an isolating one. So the more support they have, the better.
Remind Them of Your Support
Demonstrating your commitment and genuine concern for their well-being sends your loved one a powerful message: you are not alone.
Let them know that you will never judge or pressure them to do anything they don’t want to do. Reassure them that you are there for the long haul and will always be open to listening and offering support when needed.
You can show your support in other ways, too. Offer to come over with a meal or some snacks, buy them something small they may enjoy, take them on a walk, or simply spend quality time together.
You can also check in with your loved one regularly. Asking about their well-being is also a great way to keep the conversation going and show that you’re still committed to their well-being.
Reach Out for Help
Dealing with mental health issues isn’t easy. It also takes time to get better. But your support can make all the difference in helping your loved one find the hope they need to keep going. You never know what your support may do for them. So, take the time to be present with your loved one and initiate the conversation today.
To get help or for more information about how to support someone with mental health issues, contact Alvarado Parkway Institute at 619-333-7050. Our team of caring professionals can help guide you and your loved one through this difficult journey.
